nourished

“Each time you look at a tangerine, you can see deeply into it. You can see everything in the universe in one tangerine. When you peel it and smell it, it’s wonderful. You can take your time eating a tangerine and be very happy.” ― Thích Nhất Hạnh, Peace Is Every Step: The Path of Mindfulness in Everyday Life

For as long as I can recall, I struggled with my body image.  Food and weight was a loaded subject in my household growing up; a story that can be traced back several generations.  Our bodies were commented on in less than empowering ways and complements weren't experienced positively when received.  My father died at the age of 52 of heart disease and type II diabetes that stemmed from a life of obesity.  I knew I wanted to be healthier, but without a model of what that looked like I was in for a long road of trial and error.  I've struggled with headaches and IBS, PCOS, obesity, disordered body image and eating and an un-inspired, non- athletic, deconditioned childhood.

In the last two decades I've tried every style of "healthy eating" from veganism to paleo.  I've restricted my calories and eliminated food groups, worked with fitness coaches, dietitians, acupuncturists and physicians...  For a long time I hated preparing meals, I'm just starting to really embrace the preparation.  How I made changes had SO much to do with learning about food and how it affected MY body AND also understanding the values surrounding food and nourishment, the ones I choose for myself and the ones that were passed down. I believe in the power of gaining awareness over our the stories and fuel that feeds us.  With awareness we can find healing, we can re-prioritize, re-inspire ourselves and learn how to nourish ourselves fully.

I have learnt that what works best for me is to eat a diet rich in unprocessed whole foods.  I don't stress the occasional treats or processed foods -- I practice mindful eating and enjoyment.   I don't use a scale very often, I listen to how my body feels.  I embrace my fluctuating body in all it's shapes and sizes and strengths.

Our relationships with food and the emotions we tie to eating have the power to free us of hold us back. I don't want to pass down the lessons about food and body image and nourishment that where passed down to me,  I choose body freedom.  I choose nourishment.  

In Warmth & Wellness,

working with me

“The mind is everything. What you think you become.”―Buddha

Therapy can be extremely rewarding when you engage in the process of trying on new perspectives, tweaking habits that don’t serve you, and learning to nurture yourself and your relationships in new ways. The work of opening and examining your inner world — and trusting to share that process with another — requires considerable courage.

Together, we cultivate a healing relationship that nurtures the delicate balance of listening to your inner wisdom, respecting your limits, and encouraging growth. We take time to explore your hopes, joys, and fears to better understand your journey and find more satisfaction in your life and relationships. I help you build awareness of your own strengths and deepen your bond to yourself and become the person (or partnership) you would like to be.

As a psychotherapist specializing in maternal and relationship wellness, I work with women and couples to enhance both partners ability to understand and communicate effectively with one another, work as an effective, loving team and rebuild and/or maintain intimacy in your relationship.  Helping women, couples and families through the pregnancy and postpartum and parenting spectrum is a primary focus of my practice.

I work with many new(ish) mothers who have lost track or forgotten how to nurture and care for themselves. There is no wellness in depletion.  Mothers are sacred. They hold the family together with their pivotal nurturing role. Motherhood (and fatherhood, too) provides opportunity to grow beyond by nurturing and meeting needs within ourselves and rediscovering our sacredness.  It is for that reason that I believe whole-family wellness begins with the mother’s wellness.

I am very interested in how the mind and body work together. I believe all patterns and habits --of both movement and of thought-- can be refined and honed. Sometimes this work is best achieved in my psychotherapy office, sometimes in my gym.  Life presents challenges and stressors. Utilizing weight and fitness training in therapy is a novelty for sure, and it's not for everyone, but I do offer it to select clients.  Regardless of where we work, the premise of the work is that we can practice and hone mental training cues that work best for you in therapy/in sport/under the barbell, and then you can learn to translate them into your life and your relationships.

When you choose to enter into a nurturing therapeutic relationship with me, we utilize my unique blend of psychotherapy and coaching to reshape mind, body, and spirit.  We build on your strengths.  We tap into the power of relationships, first through developing our therapeutic relationship with one another, then by honing your relationship with yourself and eventually through coaching you how to use what you have learned in therapy in all of your other life relationships.  We practice mindfulness and compassion; we nurture wellness.  Wellness is multi-dimensional; body, mind & spirit --it begins in the mind and is nurtured through our self-view and our relationships with others.

In other words, we tap into your strength potential and get you good with yourself --body, mind & spirit-- then we build on that and make your connections to others in your life stronger too.

In Warmth & Wellness,

 

It's all in the set-up!

I was reading the comments on one of my favorite Facebook pages and a follower asked

"How do you ever really feel peace when you try and try and try again and continue to FAIL! It is hard to feel at peace with your body when you look in the mirror and hate what you see  If only there were more sources that make you feel ok in your skin! I love the concept of the new jean commercial that states the size as "amazing" or "sassy"..."   

I'm not usually one to respond to followers on someone else's page, but this time I did. I said,

"Set goals that aren't subjective.  When you run a mile, you've run a mile.  When you run it faster than you did last time that's a personal record.  Set goals that allow you to build success upon success so you focus on the successes rather than the failures. It's all in the set-up."

Can you see the difference between my comment and the one I was responding to?

This past year I've attended a variety of Olympic Lifting coaching trainings and I've learned very valuable coaching perspectives from all of them, perhaps the most valuable takeaway for me;  it's all in the set-up!  

If you are comparing yourself to advertisements you aren't going to look as airbrushed or styled, or fit.  Even the actors/models/athletes/politicians themselves don't in real life.

If you start comparing yourself to yourself and start looking at non-subjective goals, it's going to start adding up.

Confidence will grow and it will get easier to keep looking for success.

Here are some more little tidbits I've picked up in relation to coaching the Olympic Lifts, can you see why this SO speaks to the psychotherapist in me...? ;)

• Learn the skills to observe and analyze and you can deepen pathways to provide more ease, efficiency and effectivity.
• The greater the technique, and skill, the more movement we can make under stress (i..e.,weight on the barbell/life).  Both strength and technique are buildable.
• Look for weakness not as an end, but with the end in mind.
• Learn to see pathways towards success and isolate how to get there.
• Look at the process; where and why you are there.
• Understand where do you want to go and how to get there and then they craft a program to get there; maintain focus and observation allowing for shifts to programing as needed.
• The learning and refinement of skill and strength creates a new pathway and a successful pattern.   Success built upon success and allows for greater growth.

I like to think that this is a role I take on with my clients.  Not necessiarily in relation to coaching athletes on Olympic Lifts, but certainly that I take the process of breaking down skills strengths and patterns into successful training pathways and apply that methodology to other pathways in life as well; building success upon success in the form of mental training and coaching.

How do you shape your paradigm so you see opportunities for success rather than failure?