Nurturing Your Family & Yourself
You want to create a nurturing environment for your family. You want to be available to those who depend on you, but you also need to receive nurturing.
Ghosts from your past may make an appearance when you're faced with the fresh challenges of motherhood. Old wounds that never quite healed, memories that still have a hold on your mind and heart, and past fears that still linger can all come to call during the time following a birth, especially when you are tired and frazzled and trying to adapt to life with a new little one in the house.
In both the postpartum period and beyond, parents are met with stresses and expectations, both their own and those of others. You want to feel, and may even be told to feel joyful, grateful, and full of bliss but it is common to experience a sense of loss, anxiety, worry, confusion, and sadness as you move through the many stages of parenthood.
Turning the Focus onto You
The motherhood journey isn't solely about recovering from birth and getting to know the habits of you new baby. It's also a time to learn about yourself. You may miss the life you had before. This transition can involve grief for the loss of freedom and the changes in your relationship with your partner, family, and friends.
Parents often encounter complicated emotions and recover old memories that feel uncomfortable and even dangerous. In truth, being a parent exposes your human vulnerabilities; your own unmet needs may resurface when you begin to tune into the needs of your child.
And while it can be incredibly hard to dive in and make meaning out of all these hard to sit with feelings when you do, you'll gain insight and clarity surrounding your relationship with yourself and with others in your life. You'll uncover, examine, re-narrate, and re-frame the issues that keep showing up and begin to assemble new tools to build your own relational and parenting toolkit.
Reconnecting to Your Inherent Wisdom
It’s all too easy to lose your connection with your most essential source of wisdom: your own intuition. Ideally, you strive to strike a balance between your child’s needs, your own needs, and the needs of the rest of your family. More typically, however, you find yourself attending to whomever seems to have the most compelling needs and, in the process, often risk losing track of other family members...and yourself.
I'll gently guide you to discover what aspects of yourself need attention and healing. Supporting you as you develop the tools and approaches that suit your unique family situation is the greatest service I can offer. I always consider myself a resource, never “an authority.”
Working with Me
I pair real life experience as a mom who has had her own struggles and challenges with my advanced professional training. I've been studying and working with parents and families affected by postpartum mood and anxiety for the better part of the last decade. I've studied under Dr. Sandra Leiblum at the Center for Sexual and Relationship Health at UMDNJ, Karen Klieman of the Postpartum Stress Center, with The Seleni Institute, with The Gottman Institute and am now studying under Elly Taylor in her Becoming Us™ method.
I admit, I do have some favorite psychological theories, one of which is “the good enough mother,” by Donald Winnicott. Essentially, this concept reminds us that it is important not to be perfect. A perfect parent teaches a child that it is not ok to fail. We all make mistakes as parents, and in many ways, our kids rely on those mistakes so they can learn to be resilient in a world that is always going to be less than perfect.