I’m Rebecca Wong. a relationship therapist, consultant, and speaker. I live in New York’s Hudson Valley with my husband, our two daughters and 3 four-legged-mischief-makers.
When you truly see yourself you create a ripple effect that allows you to be the change you wish to see in the world, and that invites those around you to do the same.
Let’s be real, we are living in uncertain times and relationships are insanely hard. Add in the complexities of relationships that grew you up + the messiness of modern life.
This messy journey is an integral part of being human. It’s what you come across when you search for meaning and connection in a world full of suffering and uncertainty.
My own humanity is the inspiration that stirred me to explore and ultimately create Connectfulness, a research based practice deeply inspired by my work with parenting couples. I intimately understand just how messy and complex modern life is. And I also know how that mess can trigger a lifetime of “stuff.” I’ve sifted through my own narratives and explored my own pain. I’ve dug deeper in search of a-ha moments.
What I’ve discovered in my 4+ decades of being human and my 2+ decades of studying humanity, is that the most common shared human concerns aren’t about what happens after we die, but about the state of our relationships and legacy.
Modern relationships face unique challenges.
These modern challenges are the exploration of much of my work. Your most intimate everyday relationships, the same ones that trigger you to the core, constantly present you with two choices; to grow together or apart.
If your childhood experiences meant that growing up felt more like growing apart, then it may be hard to sink into what togetherness feels like. It might be hard to embrace and experience connection in your everyday relationships. After all, it wasn’t modeled to you from the beginning. (And before you start blaming your parents or anyone else, keep in mind, we are all doing the best we can.)
My Mission is to put curiosity back at the core of the modern relationships, home and community.
I believe that we need to cultivate safe spaces for relationships to fail, rebuild and strengthen thanks to the wisdom that comes from being able to learn together with the people who matter most. It’s these opportunities for openness that make it possible for everyone to feel seen, understood and supported — even in the most vulnerable moments. And when you take responsibility for your own growth you make sense of and reclaim your story of connection.
That’s the not-so-secret secret: sustaining happy relationships is a practice. It’s about being open to seeing your own patterns both in how you treat yourself and how you treat others. It helps you change your relationship patterns so that everyone feels seen, safe, and heard.
In my quest to find meaning, I’ve driven deep into the study of art, film & storytelling, experiential learning, relationships, sexuality, the human reproductive life cycle, trauma, parenthood, attachment, loss and human behavior, and performance.
Through this journey into creativity, well-being & relationships, I’ve discovered that the meaning we make of our life’s story is where it all comes together. But staying engaged in the process of discovering that meaning – that is often our greatest challenge.
Luckily, there’s an easier way to stay engaged in the messy process: it begins with a connectfulness practice…with yourself.
I’ll help you develop the skills you need explore and resculpt the patterns between you and the people and events that matter most with new eyes.
I invite you to get curious to see what works and what doesn’t. You’re making space for compassion, intimacy and ability to slow down and capture the littlest moments.
I’m dreaming that we can collectively learn, grow and lean into the possibility of leaving behind a more resilient and compassionate planet then we were born into.
The Nitty Gritty Deets...
New York State Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW-R) #076600
Masters in Social Work, New York University 2003
Bachelors in Fine Arts, Ithaca College 1997
Post Graduate Training with the Real Life Institute, International Institute for Animal Assisted Play Therapy™, The Doherty Relationship Institute, Seleni Institute, The Gottman Institute, The Postpartum Stress Center under Karen Kleinman, The Center for Sexual and Relationship Therapy at Robert Wood Johnson Medical School under Sandra Leiblum, PhD, The American Board of Sports Psychology under Dr. Carlstedt, CrossFit & Outward Bound.