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Come back to the body — where the wisdom is.
Cyndi Darnell is an internationally renowned sex and relationship therapist. Her approach spans the clinical to the esoteric. She’s spearheading progressive sex & relationships seminars and workshops for adults and clinicians that deeply change people’s lives. Cyndi’s on a mission to eliminate stigma from discussions around sex, erotism and pleasure and changing our fears and transform it into freedom.
In this episode, Cyndi and I discuss:
How the sexual revolution missed the boat to discuss pleasure (especially womxn’s pleasure) that center on what each individual’s motivation is.
Permission to own your motivation.
Understanding the story that you’re holding onto that’s holding you back and causing you pain.
Cyndi shares her distinct definitions of love and sex (much like chocolate and red wine).
Sex changes over time and so we continue to learn about ourselves.
The more we experience ourselves the more we understand our motivations.
Internal motivation is vital, know why you want things to change.
Sex can be an opportunity to live a more visceral and colorful life.
Erotic pleasure relates back to early childhood before we had stigmas, values and judgements placed upon us and receive the smiling gaze of another.
Societal misconceptions: the body is inherently dangerous and the intellect is superior.
How we participate in keeping myths alive by cutting ourselves off from our own bodies.
How to reconnect the body through a daily practice of tuning into the body.
Masturbation as a way of integrating erotic pleasure into your life,
“Erotic Self Care”
Consent Culture and Sex Ed that goes beyond Abstinence, Reproduction and even Consent and includes Pleasure.
Tea and Consent video made an assumption that everyone likes tea: oversimplification of consent being yes vs no
The real question is ‘what kind of sex do you like?’ Cyndi says this is where the wheels come off for most people.
Making a practice of talking about sex and erotism.
Cyndi’s erotic awakening story.
Coming back to the body, that’s where the wisdom is.
RESOURCES:
Find Cyndi Darnell online at www.cyndidarnell.com
Purchase Cyndi’s video series: The Atlas of Erotic Anatomy and Arousal
If you long to know more about erotic desire, passion, what your turn-ons are and how to communicate them with your partner/s – then join Cyndi for The Desire Series.
While these discussions will guide you into the Connectfulness Practice, the podcast is not meant to be a substitute for counseling from a licensed provider. Reach out. Initiate the ripple. Learn more about my connectfulness counseling practice and our collective for therapists in private practice here.
