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The family system is the first filter children experience the world through, it informs the senses and creates the meaning from which each of us understand the “me”, our unique “who I am.” It’s up to parents to reach in and help the growing child navigate their reality —but that‘s not what usually happens— usually parents try to make the child become what the parent needs the child to be so that the parent is comfortable.
In this episode, my teacher, Jan Bergstrom, LMHC will help us understand how the Self exists in relation to our own perceptions, our own thoughts, our own experiences, and our own souls. Jan is an expert in field of codependency, developmental and relational trauma in the lineage of Pia Mellody, a pioneer in treating the affects of childhood trauma in adults.
We’ll go into depth about the 5 Core Practices for Becoming Your Healthiest Self. After all, that’s the journey each of us is on —to discover the Self— it’s the crux of our lives. How do we know the Self? How do we know who we are? What creates a sense of Self, protects a sense of Self, gets in the way of developing a sense of Self, and what practices help to bring us back to our sense of Self.
. . . notes from this episode . . .
How we know the Self?
The impact of Nature and Nurture, or lack of nurture when it comes to childhood trauma.
Codependency, as termed by Pia Mellody, currently referred to as childhood and relational trauma and as developmental immaturity.
Why we’re broadening the definition of trauma to include both overt abuse and covert neglect: the neglect we don’t know we have because it’s what we didn’t get. The invisible things that are not seen.
Guidance to the middle was missing and is the journey. We’re all in this continuum somewhere, trying to find the middle.
Self care as related to discernment and interdependence.
Soul care, inherent sense of self worth, preciousness.
Ego Adaptations and Soulful Recalibration.
Accountability and responsibility on the part of the parent allows the child to let go of what isn’t there’s to hold onto.
Brain myelination isn't complete until about the age of 24.
Five Core Issues: self esteem, protecting the self, sense of reality, Self care and moderation.
3 different kinds of boundaries: external boundaries, sexual boundaries, and internal boundaries.
2 parts of internal boundaries: the protective/listening boundary and the containing/speaking boundary.
Pia Mellody’s Post Induction Treatment Model.
. . . resources . . .
Jan’s book “Gifts from a Challenging Childhood: Creating a Practice for Becoming Your Healthiest Self” is available on amazon.
Jan Bergstrom’s clinical practice
Healing Trauma Network is a directory that can help you to locate a trauma healing professional that utilize Pia Mellody’s Post Induction Therapy (PIT) model.
Healing Our Core Issues Institute (HOCII) trains therapists to work effectively with developmental and relational trauma using Pia Mellody’s integrative Post Induction Therapy model.
February 27-29th, 2020 I’m hosting a 3-day intensive trauma healing workshop, “Reclaiming Our Power,” based on the treatment model developed by Pia Mellody. It will be facilitated by another of my teachers, Kim Ploussard, LMHC, I’ll be assisting. To register or for more information send us a message at hello@connectfulness.com space is limited.
While these discussions will guide you into the Connectfulness Practice, the podcast is not meant to be a substitute for counseling from a licensed provider. Reach out. Initiate the ripple. Learn more about my connectfulness counseling practice, intensives, and our collective for therapists in private practice at connectfulness.com/work-with-me.
This episode is brought to you by Therapy Notes. Therapy Notes is a simple, secure, EHR platform that keeps you organized and creates a container for all details that run a private practice -- so you can tend to what really matters. Use the promo code connectfulness and get two months free when you sign up at therapynotes.com
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